Do Cats Think Humans Are Cats?
Meow! It's Charlie. Mom had a question for me today, and I thought other humans could learn a bit about cats from this!
Mom: Charlie?
Charlie: That's me.
Mom: Do you think I'm a cat, but bigger?
Charlie: Well you certainly are big but of course you aren't a cat. A cat wouldn't be able to trick a cat into being my slave.
Mom: I'm not your slave.
Charlie: Of course not.
Mom: So what do you think I am?
Charlie: An elephant seal.
Mom: An elephant seal?? I look nothing like an elephant seal!
Charlie: A blue whale then. Frankly it's amazing you've survived out of water this long.
Mom: Be serious!
Charlie: I am serious - I've seen you lay on the couch and watch TV.
Mom: Do you really not know what I am?
Charlie: Well you could pull off being a sloth for how much time you take to get my dinner.
Mom: Charlie, I'm a human.
Charlie: Is that like an elephant seal?
Mom: It is nothing like an elephant seal.
Charlie: Strange how they look so much alike.
Mom: Charlie, humans are highly advanced beings that are capable of advanced thinking and reasoning. For example, we take care of cats.
Charlie: Since when?
Mom: Since 10 minutes ago when you meowed and I fed you.
Charlie: Wrong once again. Humans are really dumb. I meowed to remind you that we BOTH need food. You forget that every few hours.
Mom: If we're so dumb, then why do I go to work and spend all my money on you?
Charlie: Because, once again, humans are dumb. I stay home all day and nap and get free stuff. Who's the smart one now?
Mom: Hmph.
Charlie: And if it weren't for cats, humans would sleep the whole night!
Mom: That's the idea Charlie.
Charlie: You can race around the house like a maniac if you're asleep, idiot. Also, people are hypochondriacs.
Mom: How so?
Charlie: Every day you get in your metal box and go to the vet.
Mom: That's called a car and I'm going to work.
Charlie: Don't kid me. Cars are for going to the vet. And judging by what I see going by the house, humans go to the vet a lot. Such a sickly species. It's amazing you've survived this long.
Mom: Do you really think cats are smarter than humans?
Charlie: I'm not the one who is about to open a can of cat food to prevent me from peeing on the wood floor.
Mom: You wouldn't...
Charlie: Use your oh-so-incredible brain. Of course I would.
Thanks for reading! What kind of animal do you think humans are most like? Chow!
