Pet Ways Training Continues
Meow! It's Charlie. Today me and Jett continued with her training of the Pet Ways.
Jett: Hey Charlie!
Charlie: How dare you be so informal! Talk to me with respect! Mr. Charlie, Professor Charlie, Major Charlie, Your awesomeness, Charlie the Great, something!
Jett: Oh oh...so..sorry...Charlie...I, I, I mean Professor Charlie.
Charlie: Much better! Hello Jett. Did you do your home work?
Jett: Yes.
Charlie: Well where is it?
Jett: I ate it.....
Charlie: Despicable creature. Whatever. Let's just get on with the lesson. Now, when Sparkles takes you out on a walk to the park, you poop. She then picks up the poop with a bag. Take two things from this scenario - one, that you must not poop inside. I have a very strong sense of smell. And two, the owner must pick up your poop. That is an action by the human to show that animals are much more superior to humans. If you were to walk down the street and see two creatures walking together, one of them poops and the other one picks up the poop, who would you think was in charge?
Jett: The one that picked up the poop!
Charlie: No! Bad dog. Incorrect. The one who has a slave to pick up their poop would be in charge.
Jett: Ohhhhhh.
Charlie: The most important thing you will learn from this class is about to come out of my mouth. Are you listening?
Jett: La, la, la la....
Charlie: JETT!!!
Jett: OH! Sorry. The answer is cucumber.
Charlie: What?? No. What?
Jett: The reason it is cucumber is because 7.
Charlie: That makes 0 sense. Anyways, I am going to say the most valuable piece of advice you will EVER hear. Do. Not. Annoy. The. Cat. Got it? Do NOT annoy the cat.
Jett: Why not?
Charlie: Because the cat is the basically a god. The Egyptians weren't all stupid you know.
Jett: Of course not. They ended up worshiping dogs instead of cats. OHHHH! Crash and burn Charlie!
Charlie: I'm about to show you why you don't annoy cats.
And that's when I chased Jett around the house with my claws out. I could have caught her if I wanted, but since I am nice and not a bully I didn't. I did claw her enough that she learned her lesson though. Now is when you shower me with compliments like, "Oh Charlie, you will sacrifice everything just to make sure one little puppy gets a bright education," and "Oh Charlie, you are so nice and willing, and handsome too!" And yes, yes I am. *Fur blows in the wind*
Ok, enough with my drama. This post is taking almost as long as the class itself is. I need to go catch up on my naps. Thanks for reading! Come back tomorrow! Chow!
